February 14, 2019

Just seeing delicious looking food on Instagram does not trigger my obsession with a particular kind of food. It’s when I actually make a plan to eat it that the image of it gets stuck in my head. In most cases, once I have it, the image clears, but sometimes, it lingers on. I think sex works the same way—I won’t elaborate.

After eating tonkatsu at Curry-ya with @wandersauce, the image of it did not fade from my head. In fact, it got stronger. So, today, I had to go to the closest restaurant that serves tonkatsu by myself. It was good. I liked the whole combo. I’m not sure what they put on the rice but it was tasty.

Lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about the difference between desire and drive. Usually, my desire fades once it’s attained, and something else becomes desirable. My desire for tonkatsu will eventually shift to something else. Drive, on the other hand, doesn’t. Or, rather, that is how I differentiate them. If my urge to do something doesn’t ever fade, I call it “drive” and if it does shift, I call it “desire”

In my view, the mistake many people make when choosing their careers is that they confuse desire and drive. You should not choose your career based on your desire, because your career needs to last a long time. So, when listening to the popular advice, “Do what you love,” don’t equate “love” with desire, but with drive.

Drive is something you don’t feel as your own. It has its own will, and many people have trouble controlling it. It’s sort of like a wild horse; if you can tame it, it’s great, but otherwise, it’s dangerous. So, it’s more natural to equate “love” with desire than with drive.

In a piece titled “so you want to be a writer?” Charles Bukowski says, “if it doesn’t come bursting out of you, in spite of everything, don’t do it.” This tells me that writing was his drive, not his desire. If you became a writer, because writing was your desire, you are going to face a lot of writer’s blocks.

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