I never talk about what I’m grateful for in life. If someone puts me on the spot to answer, within myself, I sense resistance to putting it into words. It’s like how some cultures believed photography can steal their souls. Language, or any system of representation like photography, is a tool to represent what is not there. Words or photos therefore have the effect of reminding us of what is lacking in them. Even in situations where the thing or the person we described in words or in photographs still happens to be there, they remind us of the possibility of disappearance, lack, or loss. This is partly why we take pictures of our joyous moments. As we experience the joy, we are already worrying about the end or the loss of that joy, and this worry can prevent us from fully enjoying that moment. In this sense, language or photography, if used in a certain way, can steal your soul.
As far back as I can remember, I’ve always been obsessed with logically understanding the world around me. Until I find a satisfactory explanation for why something is the way it is, I can’t sleep well at night. Ultimately this is all driven by fear. Whatever explanation I come up with is a temporary measure to calm myself down, that is, it’s a fictional tale. In my view, one can appreciate the true value of theory only if one realizes its fundamentally fictional nature. As with anything fictional, there is art to telling a theory. That is what I strive to do on this website.
This does not mean that everything presented on this website is completely made up. They are based on what we all perceive as “facts” and “truths”. The only difference is that I accept these “facts” and “truths” to be fundamentally indeterminate, which allows me to enjoy theories as a form of art or even entertainment.
I do not have any predetermined schedule for publishing new materials on this site. I write whenever I feel compelled to, and I write about things that most people around me do not find interesting. The Web is a perfect place to share them, because there is always someone somewhere in this world who is thinking about the same things I am.
If you are one of these people, and if you have something you want to share on this site, please email it to me.